26 November 2010

one week

a baby is born with the need to be loved:

i can not begin to adequetly express the
love & gratitude
that i feel for my little mcphee family.

its already been one week since my son has greeted this world.
the week leading up to his delievery was an emotional one for me.
i probably cried in public {in front of family} a few times,
but in private, i was a complete mess.
so many different emotions.

on thursday
{the 18th of nov}
paul & i made our way to the hospital to check in for my "pre-op".
he started kayl's documentary,
which acually made the whole experience a little less "heavy".
i was asked a million different questions about my past medical history,
told not to eat or drink anything after midnight,
had my blood drawn,
got one of many hospital bracelts on my right wrist,
& was told we were first on the list for surgery.
so be at the hospital at 5:00 am.

wow.

November 19,
came so fast.

early friday morning i found myself,
getting ready & packing the last few items i might need for my hospital stay.
what a sureal experience.
once again, paul & i headed to the hospital
but this time intow with baby boy clothes & a name.

truth be told, we had the name kayl
{pronounced kale}
picked out a while ago.

preping for surgery went much faster
& with more ease than i expected.
my nurse got my IV in the first time around.
awesome.
spinal block went great,
loved the surgical team that was with me,
& was so grateful to have my wonderful husband by my side.
he is amazing you know, & i love him.

before i knew it,
someone said the baby's head is out.
i heard suctioning
& two faint cries.
i started to whel up with tears.
i knew that he wasn't crying as loud or as hard as everyone wanted.
my dr. gave me a quick peek over the blue curtain hanging above my face
of my baby boy.
i cried.
he of course was perfect.
i glanced over to my husband, he too was full of tears
& a new love was again sparked between us.

someone told paul to go with kayl.
i was still trying to hear him cry.
it was only a few here & there,
before the aniestiologist asked if i wanted something to take the edge off.
i asked her why he wasn't crying,
i can't really remember what she replied with,
except for asking the same question again.... something to take the edge off.
this time i agreed.
& i dosed off.
long enough that when i woke up, i was sewed up & ready to be shipped off to my room
for recovery.

kayl spent the first 7 hours of his life under the oxygen hood in the nursery.
paul kind of kept me in the dark about how nervous he was about kayl's breathing.
i think the morphine drip i was on helped mask his anxiety.

i got to hold my baby boy for the first time
a little after 3 oclock that afternoon.
& i love him.

nora came to the hospital with my mom
twice.
i saw her a total of 3 minutes, combine.
she doesn't care about having a brother.
which is completely fine with me.
because i will always love having her.

kayl ray is such a blessing
&
a perfect addition to what used to be the 3 mcphees.

{you can also read mr. mcphee's thoughts about our sweet baby kayl here}



Kayl Ray McPherson
November 19, 2010
6lbs 8oz
20 inches long
7:56 A.M.






& i love this boy more than ever.









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